How to walk and hike with small children

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Taking a walk with kids is something we could all become well-versed in right now. Facing the inability to go to the playground means that we have a rare opportunity to really find ways to immerse ourselves in nature with our children.
I know full well that this is not always easy. We have had a long-standing morning routine of getting outside first thing after breakfast. Two mornings per week my kids go to nature school. So, the other mornings I take all 3 kids outside (5,3, and 6 months) and the other mornings I take just the baby. But for now I will take all 3 kids out all 5 mornings.
This morning I was tired. We have kept most of the information about this virus from our kids and just given them a simple explanation that “there is more sickness in the world than usual so we can’t go to school, the library or the park.” But they sense something. Both my girls have had insomnia during the night for the past few and I am tired today. Night wakings from 3 at once can get exhausting.
So, I was tired and I really didn’t feel like motivating them to go on a walk, which was the most accessible thing to do today. Luckily for me it is a routine, which makes it come a little easier, and I know full well that the entire day will be better when we spend the first part of the day outside.
There are a few reasons it makes everything better.
​Before we had kids, my husband and I loved to hike together and now we still love to be outside to walk and hike as a family. Yes, there are challenges, and yes, it's different from hiking just as two adults.
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However, hiking and taking walks with small children can be really fun. Here are some of the things we've learned to help us enjoy these times outside being active with our kids.

​But why would you do this with children that young?

I know what you might be thinking: "That sounds difficult and frustrating, and you will not get anywhere!"
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We had times where we felt like that too. Then we asked ourselves a simple question:

"Why do we like walking and hiking?"

When you ask yourself this question, some obvious answers could be:

• Getting exercise
• Being outside and in nature
• Discovering something new or beautiful
• Getting the chance to talk with friends or spouse
• Regulating sleep cycles

There are many more benefits, as outlined in this article.

​Focus on the little discoveries, not the big trail

​It turns out that we can accomplish all of the above points with our children. Especially with the discovery of something new or beautiful, children actually enrich the experience. Kids discover things all the time. By slowing the whole process down, you are more likely to find and take the time to rescue the lonely turtle out of a puddle.
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Even the *getting exercise* part can be enriched, as you will add different movements to your walk by...

• Bending down to inspect flowers or insects,
• Walking off the path,
• Carrying your toddler
• Looking up into the sky to watch a flock of birds
• Practicing any stretch/strength moves such as some squats while the kids pick flowers, a calf stretch on a rock while they are catching up, or a single leg balance while you wait to cross the street. (Check out the deck of Mama Moves Cards for more ideas! The cards and online course are on sale through school closure time for 30% off using coupon code MOVEWITHKIDS)

So, everything should be fine, but why can hiking/walking appear to be so
difficult?

..Well, we noticed that on a hike, we would often come to a place and say things like, "I want to walk the long five-mile trail today," or, "Let's go to the top and back."

So, we were setting goals to pursue for our hike that turned out to be fulfilling in the past, i.e., before we had children... And guess what?

It does not work with young children (yet).

Hiking as a family means having different considerations. You can push yourself, but you have to make sure not to push your little one over the edge into being cold, tired, hungry, or feeling like they have nothing to do but just go along with whatever mom or dad are doing.

Sometimes engaging them is as simple as: "Look at this stick over there! How does it feel when you hold it? What sounds does it make when I tap it on the ground?" One wintery hike we asked dour kids to help us gather evergreen boughs and "sweep" the path. That worked wonders and we hiked about two miles, even with two toddlers! 

Kids know that there is an entire world to explore when walking and hiking. Well, it took us adults some time not to feel we were missing out on our hikes, until we realized that although our personal "goals" are very different from our children's during hikes, we do not have to miss out.
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See, whatever happens, we are in nature, we are exercising, we are discovering, and we do spend time with each other.

​Setting goals and expectations

​If we want to set a quantifiable goal for a hike, we now set a minimum duration in hours, not miles. Instead of focusing on hiking to a certain point or distance, we focus on being together, exploring, and paying attention to what our girls need. This gives the flexibility to stop for long times, yet often we can still get very far.

Okay, you might say, that all sounds nice, but how do I get my toddler to walk at all?

I get it. Four hours spent in nature with a whining child ten feet away from the starting point, is not cool. My honest answer is that I don't know how to avoid it completely, but we are getting smarter over time and learning what works for our kids. Some walks will be harder, and some easier just as every day with children can look really different. Over time, when walks become a habit, they WILL grow and it WILL get easier. Many people I have talked to expect their kids to complain on walks. But when I ask them how frequently they walk with their kids, the answer is "occasionally." which typically means less than every week. When kids get accustomed to good, relaxed times being spent on walks they will look forward to it and accept it as a normal part of life. My kids complain if we ever have to go in the car because their "normal" is biking or walking. 
You mileage will vary of course, as you figure out what works and doesn't for your kids, but here is an excerpt of what we have learned so far:
Most important: 

• Bring lots and lots of snacks and food, and take long breaks to eat.
• Bring enough clothes so you do not get cold.

If they are unmotivated to walk, you can give them tasks during the walk:

• Can you carry this big stick for me?
• Can you find a purple flower blooming already?
• Do you want to carry this lunch bag?
• Do you want to hold hands with you sister/brother?

Kids love to have tasks and help out. For example, taking kids out to gather something works really well too:

• Let’s find things to make a fairy house at home! (Sticks, bark, flowers, leaves, lichens, etc.)
• See the apple tree at the top of this hill? Let's hike to it so we can pick apples!
• Can you find the dandelions? Let’s pick a bouquet!
• Can you look for the blackberries we are going to pick?

Be prepared to carry your child for periods of time if (s)he is tired. This one really is a win-win if approached with a certain mindset. You can get really strong from carrying children if you are mindful of your alignment and carry them in a variety of positions:

• Try side carry keeping your spine stacked, or a piggy-back where you ask them to help hold on with their arms (older kids), or on the shoulders.
• All of the times carrying kids will enhance your core, arm, hand, leg and foot strength.
• It can be a really fun connection with kids.
• Wearing a baby carrier can be a nice tool too.

Play some silly games, or make up some silly songs while walking.

• I am going to hide, can you find me?
• Chase me!
• Can you walk like a frog? A bear?
• Can you make a sound like that bird?
• Want to play “I Spy?”
• Make up your own games/songs stories! I mentioned the "sweep the path" directive above and lately we have also been playing a game we made up one day called "I wish I could see." We were 1/2 block from home when the 3-year-old started seriously dragging and I really had to pee. TO keep her moving I said "I wish I could see a clown fish perched on top of a tree!" They picked it up and started saying all kinds of silly combinations of things they wish they could see.. ("I wish I could see a horse on that porch. I wish I could see a pig carrying a teapot...")

It can also really help to take friends along on a walk. More adults mean more people to carry the kids, make up games, and bring fresh ideas. Friends for the kids are almost always motivating for each other. If you invite a friend or two it also stacks in #vitamincommunity with your walk... (Not right now, huh? This was written a couple years ago. Right now I opt for family walks and occasional one-on-one walks with a friends, staying several feet apart.)

​Yes, meltdowns can happen too.

If your child is having a hard time...
One of the things I try to remember is that I am always less stressed outside and it can be a great place to give some space for little ones to feel and process through emotions. When they are having feelings, I try to stay centered myself in order to give them patience and give myself calm. I take deep breaths, I try to feel my own body and remember that it is not my job to "fix" their feelings but rather that the ability to feel our emotions and process them is an asset to our own humanity. We are likely all feeling A LOT these days and so are the little ones. 

• Take a break and find out what they are feeling.
• Ask where they feel this emotion in their body? (This works with our 5 year old and sometimes with the younger one. In general you can just be there for them to support their feelings and that works too.)
• Talk about what you see, hear, have picked up, etc.
• Ask if there's something scaring the child, especially if being outside is not part of your normal routine. 
• Try to get to where you can continue on a little more. If the child is fed, hydrated, not cold, etc., then can often recover quickly.

No matter what though, it's okay to turn back too. Sometimes a hike might get cut short. The trail will still be there next time.

Each step can build a love of being outside and being together as a family

The biggest point here isn't the hike itself. What matters is that you got outside, together as family, and took a walk and hike with your little ones. The memories you build on that hike can grow into a bigger love of being outside and having family togetherness, so there can be more hikes to come.